Hello There, Autumn

Hello there, autumn.

I haven’t seen much of you this year.  You began with a rush of books, papers, lists, and overload.

You turned out not at all as expected.  But I’m not complaining…

I just miss you.

The real you.

Not the indoors, nose in a book, red pen in hand, typing up assignments you.

The outdoors, leaves falling, crisp wind, fantastically free you.

So late as it is, and as much as The Crucible, Shakespeare, Fahrenheit 451, figurative language, and ACT prep hang at the back of my mind, I had to visit you today.

I had to pull on my jacket and run out to greet you amidst this blustery day.  I had to go and visit my old haunt, stripped clean of its leaves.  I had to watch the Mallards lift their wings and rise into the air, hurriedly escaping my unwanted gaze.  I had to walk along the wooded trail, stopping here and there to stare at this or that.  The wind on the pond, some fungus on a tree, a moss covered log.  I had to breathe you into my soul and grin like child.

(Forgive me pile of work back at the house.)

I’ll say it again.  Hello there, autumn.  I miss you.  Glad we could visit.  Let’s do it again sometime, eh?

The Invasion

I am currently battling an enemy.  They are persistant, stealthy masters of guerrilla warfare.  Or, in plain English:  Sneaky little jerks.

They are boxelder bugs.  And for some reason unbeknownst to me, they have decided to harrass me.  It’s fall.  It’s getting cold outside.  So the little bugs creep into the house to get warm.  And then creep over to visit me.

The other day I was sitting in my chair, grading papers.  I looked up.  There was a boxelder bug crawling up the wall next to me.  Then I turned my head.  There, reclining on my shoulder, was a BOXELDER BUG!  (See their organized tactics?  One distracts me while the other one crawls on me.  Despicable!)

Yesterday I was sitting on the floor, reading and snacking.  I was partaking of a chocolate cookie.  Quite a delicious chocolate cookie.  When suddenly, I saw something black drop into my bowl.

“Oh no!” I thought to myself.  “I dropped a chocolate chip!”  And then I looked in my bowl.

Not a chocolate chip.  Not a piece of cookie.  A BOXELDER BUG!  Invading the piece of dinnerware (or breakfastware…or plasticbowlware) from which I was eating!  Flying in and landing and impersonating a piece of chocolate!  A KAMIKAZE BOXELDER BUG!

Creepy?  I think so.

A plot to poison me or choke me to death?  Perhaps.

Then, shortly later, the attack was resumed.  By a different bug this time.  Crawling on my blanket.  Curses!

That bug being disposed of, I thought I was safe.


I fet something scratching me around the collar of my shirt. I reached up to see what it was…and felt something there inside my shirt.  A BOXELDER BUG!  This really can only be described as the last straw.

I think I shall neglect all of the grading and lesson planning that I need to do this weekend and devote myself to a more important task:

Boxelder bug warfare.

Victorious, I will be.